This morning was one of those days. It was one of those days when I woke up and I wasn’t a widow. I woke up…
Eleven years ago, I entered a beautiful dream world: The dream of happily ever after with my amazing new husband. And whilst being a Mrs…
Yesterday marked two years since I began my PhD studies. And that means I am another year closer to being Doctor Ryan. It’s a title I’ve longed for…
For the last six years, I have experienced a wide variety of what I call “widow dreams”. Some are more upsetting than others, but they…
I rolled over this morning in a sleepy haze to snuggle up to Paul, sure he would be there lying next to me. But he…
Eight years ago today, my dear friend Joe passed away. And next Sunday will mark the sixth anniversary of my beloved husband, Paul’s, death. And…
Yesterday marked one calendar year since I matriculated as a research student in the Institute for Informatics and Digital Innovation at Edinburgh Napier University. It’s hard to believe…
The alarm clock is set for 7 o’clock, but something has woken me at 6—stirring me from a pleasant dream that I want to continue.…
Way back on February 6, 2002, my friend bailed out on a day trip to St Andrews. With nothing better to do, I decided to walk…
I daydream. I always have and I always will. I suppose that it’s harmless, though it does sometimes mean that I pin a bit of…
Sometimes I like to close my eyes and imagine the life I want. It’s by no means an extravagant life—it doesn’t even include winning the…
I’ve had a couple of sleepless weeks and it’s starting to show in my face. Despite the many happy things happening, there are many frustrating and stressful things that are…
There is a sensation that passes through my heart and soul on occasion. A conscious realisation of a subconscious thought. Sometimes it’s caused by a…
As most people do, I have bad dreams from time-to-time—the bothersome little dreams that haunt you all day long: Showing up to a test unprepared;…
I used to be the most amazing sleeper. I went to bed around 10 o’clock and woke up refreshed and alert when my alarm went…
I’m going to delve into a short(ish) stream of consciousness for a bit here, because there’s a lot on my mind that I’ve wanted to share, but…
Right now, my thoughts are all about money; lots and lots and lots of money. Not in a materialistic way, but in a practical way.…
I didn’t sleep well last night. I didn’t sleep well at all. And, to be honest, I’m ever-so-slightly afraid to be home alone because of…
I like to start each year with a bright, fresh outlook; with a renewed hope for joy and happiness. But I must admit that I…
There is a man who appears in my dreams who isn’t Paul. In my dreams, we’re madly in love. And much like the widow dreams…