Life is so very different without Paul and these past four years have been a rollercoaster ride that I never could have imagined. Without Paul,…
The truth is, I fell. I fell really, really hard and I spiralled a bit. OK, maybe I spiralled a lot. It started last September…
I’ve decided to spend Christmas alone this year. I know that sounds silly to some people, but it seems like the right thing to do…
It’s been three years since Paul died so suddenly; so unexpectedly. Some days I can’t believe that he’s gone. Some days I struggle with comprehending…
It’s been a week since I last shared my mundane life with you here on Just Frances. And it’s been nearly that long since I…
It’s nearly midnight on January 2nd and I’m finally getting around to writing my first post of the year. I meant to write yesterday and I’ve…
Once again, I wanted to spend the day inside, hiding away from the world. I wanted to sit in and sulk and cry and feel…
This morning I realised that I haven’t been outside since Monday. I spent Tuesday and Wednesday holed up inside working on my dissertation proposal – and only…
I arrived in Scotland nearly two months ago, and am now on my own for the first time. In fact, I am on my own…
For more than two years now, my nights have been haunted with horrible dreams. I call them “widow dreams” and I understand from other widow(er)s…
Tonight is my last night in my house – the house I purchased with Paul a little over three years ago. This was our home; this was…
Today should be my sixth wedding anniversary. It’s the “candy” anniversary, so I should be on a sugar high by now. And Paul should be…
This isn’t the post I planned to share tonight. No, that post was a bit sad and reflective of my (sometimes) miserable lot in life…
It’s been two years since Paul died, leaving me here to live in this world without him. When we promised “Until death do us part”…
I’m sure you’ve gleaned by now that I’m very anxious and frightened about my future. And I bet some people wonder why I’m putting myself…
Grief is one of those things you can’t really explain to someone who hasn’t gone through it. Even those of us who’ve experienced extreme grief…
I’ve always been a bit put off with Valentine’s Day. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I was…
I’ve really been struggling through this holiday season – much more than last year when I was still in a bit of shock and disbelief over the…
Shortly after we got married Paul and I started a new tradition of monthly dinner parties. Parties to which we were the only guests. It…
I feel stuck some days. Frozen in this place of fear; this place with an uncertain future. I guess I thought what so many people…