The holidays are here again, and that means I’m facing an extended period of holiday hush. “Hush” because, like most years, I will be spending Christmas…
I ran my last Loch Ness Marathon yesterday. (Maybe.) And I accomplished a PB whilst doing it – which was totally unexpected. Even better, I am nowhere…
My crazy month of races began today with the Braemar Half Marathon – after forgoing last weekend’s planned 10K in favour of a wee ride on the choo-choo train. I am…
Some days, I think about how lonely I am, and about how I want to find someone to share my life with. I think about…
For nearly two years now, I’ve been experiencing an extreme amount of stress. Some days and weeks have been harder than others, but there hasn’t…
I want to have adventures. Ideally, I want to have some of those adventures with someone I love. Or at least I’d like to have some…
Ten years ago today, I became Mrs Ryan. I stood there at the altar in front of God, family, and friends – with my beloved Paul beside me – and…
For the last six years, I have experienced a wide variety of what I call “widow dreams”. Some are more upsetting than others, but they…
I rolled over this morning in a sleepy haze to snuggle up to Paul, sure he would be there lying next to me. But he…
Eight years ago today, my dear friend Joe passed away. And next Sunday will mark the sixth anniversary of my beloved husband, Paul’s, death. And…
Life is hard these days and sometimes I wonder what my limits are. Sometimes I wonder how many more disappointments and frustrations I can manage…
I think one of the hardest things about dating as a widow(er) is the guilt that comes along with it. Worse is that some of…
Dating is hard. Dating in your late 30s and early 40s is hard. Dating as a widow is hard. And trying to do all three…
From time to time, I get emails from people reading my blog. And today was one of those days. It seems that a relatively new widow, Lucy*,…
Sometimes I feel like the world is laughing at me; like life is laughing at me. Sometimes I feel like my entire life has been one failed…
Today is Paul’s birthday and I am a mess. No matter how many steps I take forward, some moments in time send me sliding back…
Yesterday marked one calendar year since I matriculated as a research student in the Institute for Informatics and Digital Innovation at Edinburgh Napier University. It’s hard to believe…
Yesterday’s writing prompt was to write “I am” ten times, then fill in the rest of the sentence. Today’s was to write “I want” ten…
Well, I’ve done it. I’ve finally bought myself a new pair of black heels – nearly five and a half years after my last pair was purchased.…
My friend, LA, introduced me to “The Bliss Scandal” so I decided I’d sign up and see what it was all about. To be completely honest, I…